Last night I thought to myself, going out in your slippers to put something in the trash outside is about the most suburban, homeowner-y thing you can do.

I was wrong. The most suburban, homeowner-y thing you can do is, having gotten a note scolding you because one of your trash receptacles was too heavy, to be ELATED to go out after pickup and find that your redistribution of garbage between trash receptacles was a success, and the garbagemen took ALL your trash away this week.

This right here, THIS is what I imagined adulthood would be all about...